Alanna Levenson with I Love My Life! Coaching talks about how being a workaholic is a strategy for something. You may get a lot done but it’s unconsciously a strategy for something else besides being productive.
You can still work the same amount of hours with a different intention although I’m wondering how you can possibly negotiate a new way you work?
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Hi Michael, I appreciate you taking the time to watch the video, thinking about this, and writing to me. It’s obvious that you are very passionate and care a lot about your your employees and having a successful business. Here are a few comments based on what you shared with me.
It seems as though your employees care as much about your business as you do. That’s great! I imagine that’s happening because of the culture you’ve created for them at work and the relationships you have with them. I am also hearing from your passion that you do love your company but you’ve given your company a power over you, that right now, you feel you have no control over.
It makes perfect senses that you are experiencing a lack of fulfillment when you are working that many hours and feeling that tired. Any human would. It also makes sense that you would experience feeling behind, over burdened, overloaded, etc. Most people in your shoes do and it’s not uncommon. I’ll also be bold and say that after coaching business owners for 10+ years that the answers you mentioned are actually not cliche. They are proposed solutions and potential ways to alleviate some of the overwhelm and exhaustion from your life.
It’s all about perspective and perception. If I had the time to work with you I would have time to teach you about the brain and how it works, how certain tasks or thinking processes are more taxing on our energy than others, etc. Your comment of “BUT I cannot get the business to quit controlling me.” is what is holding you back. What you’re forgetting is that you are at choice. Not your business.
You actually wrote something really really important. It’s revealing as to what one of your blocks are. “Just writing this makes me feel guilty when I have work to do.” That guilt is what is having an extreme power over you and is getting in your way of making a conscious choice to change the way you’re doing things. It’s also getting in your way of letting go of control, of letting others take over certain tasks, and is unfortunately really getting in your way of changing the way you are approaching your business so you can feel more fulfilled. That guilt is also related to your perfectionism. Which again, is pretty common and can be altered with a change in perspective and with some practice or different approaches.
What if your passion for making sure your employees and customers are taken care of were sustained, even though you changed how you did things so that you too can enjoy your company as much as they do? You are absolutely right when you say there is a disconnect because their level of contentment is not translating into yours as well. That’s a good sign that you are self aware and recognizing that something needs to change. In fact writing to me shows me that you are ready for change.
I hope you’re finding my response not to be cliche. You have created something from scratch and in just 9 months you are proving to yourself that you can be successful, that your business can be successful, and that you’ve created something that won’t only serve you but is in existence to serve the needs and fulfillment of others. It’s time you STOP IGNORING YOU in the process and that you stop using excuses and perceived cliche reasons to not make a change.
What has to happen for you to make a change? What’s stopping you from trying something different, just trying it on, even if you don’t know how it might turn out? My guess it’s some sort of fear, worry, doubt, or concern. Maybe it’s “I’ve tried it before and it didn’t work.” Or it’s “I can do it much faster and better than trying to train someone new.” Or “I have some ideas but I don’t know how to implement it.” Or, “what if they get offended or I lose a customer and/or an employee if I ask them to do this or if I tell them no?”
These are just guesses but reasons and excuses I hear all the time. And when my clients start to move beyond these, really amazing things start to happen. Their business actually becomes even more successful and they are surprised to be experiencing more fulfillment they didn’t think was possible. How great would it be to wake up one day and have the thought of “Wow, I don’t feel frustrated or trapped anymore!”
As I mentioned in the video, my consultations are complimentary and I’m happy to schedule time to speak with you further about what I wrote. Feel free to email me through the contact form on my website. I hope to hear from you soon!
here is the best way i can put it.
“Everyone loves my company/business; except me!!
We are a start up commercial refrigeration service company about 9 months old, of which I am the sole owner. At this point I have 3 employees that all seem to be loving life, and feel they are excited to come to work each day, and go home feeling fulfilled. I hear from employees comments along the lines of: “I am so happy I came to work here”, “I love my job”, ” I am happy again”…..
Our entire mission and core philosophy is truly “caring” for our customers, and delivering a unique level of customer service/experience. For the most part, we are seeing this mission come to fruition. On a daily basis I hear from customers, things like, “you guys are awesome”, “we really appreciate you”, “I can’t think of one negative thing about your service”, “thank you for saving the day”…..
So you would think, that a person who has customers, and employees, that are feeling satisfied, and happy, would translate into happiness for me, right?? Not the case.
I have to be honest as well. A big portion of my lack of fulfillment is probably being caused by the 16-18 hour days. I am tired, really tired. I already know all the cliche answers: delegate , outsource, shut it down when you get home, you can’t be all things to all people, systemize, digitize, prioritize, organize, you name it!!!! BUT I cannot get the business to quit controlling me. I am constantly feeling overwhelmed, behind, over-burdened, overloaded, and disappointed with my own productivity. Just writing this makes me feel guilty when I have work to do.
Yes. There is also a bit of perfectionism (and possibly control freak) going on here as well. My passion, and desire, for my employees, and customers, to be taken care of; is something I probably borderline obsess over, but the problem is, as stated above, they are loving it, yet i am not. There is a disconnect, because their level of contentment is not translating into mine as well.
Real (not cliche) wisdom and insight would be appreciated.
Feeling frustrated and trapped