A few Saturdays ago, I took an exercise class by the one and only Richard Simmons. (Yes, that Richard Simmons.) What an amazing experience. Not only did he have everyone smiling and laughing throughout the entire hour-and-fifteen-minute class, he stopped to have a brief conversation with everyone about their self-worth. More specifically, about how his classes are not just exercise classes but a place to learn about your self worth and value. That gesture alone inspired me to write to share the experience for my first newsletter.
What amazes me about doing this work is how often a prospect or new client indicates that they are lacking in “self love” or self worth. Sometimes, I even go as far as asking the question, “On a scale of 0-10, how much do you love yourself?” Most people have a look of embarrassment or shock once they confront their own opinion of themselves. I will also ask them what they do like about themselves and it amazes me how often they squirm in the idea of thinking about it, let alone saying anything out loud.
As painful as that moment can be, it can also be freeing. When a person really gets where they’re at emotionally about anything, and they can be honest about it — out loud — then they are, in a sense, releasing it rather than holding it in. You may think that by holding it in, you’re hiding that from everyone you interact with. The truth is you’re not.
Whether you believe it or not, we can read each others energy and sense that something is wrong or off, but most often we are also afraid to ask. What begins then is a cycle of inauthenticity and dishonesty. I’m not saying that you have to blurt out to everyone that you’re miserable or that you should be a constant Debbie Downer, but through coaching or other healing modalities, at least you can be honest, get it off of your chest and, most importantly, do something about it.
Please know that your low self worth didn’t just happen yesterday. Without realizing it, you were probably given some messages growing up about not being “good enough”. Or perhaps you went through an experience where you were embarrassed, and ever since then, you have probably been in an unconscious — or conscious –“self protection mode” that seems as though it’s been keeping you safe.
It may have been up to this point. But if you are reading this now, I imagine that you are tired of living life the way you have been. By staying safe, and playing small, are you where you want to be? Are you achieving what you want to achieve and checking off those items on your life long “to do” list? If you answered no to any of the above, then you’ve come to the right place.
IT IS YOUR CHOICE! Your next thought might be “yeah, but how do I move through being stuck and move past where I am now?” My question back to you, “what if there wasn’t a how?” We get so caught up with the “how” in how we are going to do anything that we don’t even take the first step. I would imagine that you probably don’t remember taking your first step when you learned how to walk. Babies don’t worry about how they are going to learn how to walk; they just follow their instinct and keep trying it. They may fall and cry a few times but eventually they not only learn how to stand up, before a parent knows it, they are chasing their kid across the living room floor.